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T in the Park 2014: Jenny’s festival diary

Jenny in full festival mode.
Jenny in full festival mode.

Courier reporter Jenny Thomson attended T in the Park for the first time at the weekend. Here’s how she got on:

FRIDAY:The sun was shining on a beautiful first day at T in the Park.

A parade of pink, pinker and scorching red bodies passed us in various stages of nakedness as we made our way towards the site.

It was sweltering and I constantly worried if I needed yet another coat of sun cream as we trudged our kit in to find our makeshift home for the weekend.

Once relieved of the burden of my heavy bag full of maybe essentials like my coat and wellies, which I really hope I don’t need we headed for the arena.

Like all cultural experiences I think the best way is to dive in with an open mind.See more from Jenny hereThe sounds from the competing stages sent shockwaves through the earth, so I could feel the music as well as hear it.

A trio of beautiful flamenco dancers trooped past, in full drag.

Revellers were enjoying the bands playing on the main stage in various ways.

Some jumped at the front while a beach ball bounced across their heads, while others, further back, were lying on the ground letting the music wash over them while soaking up the rays.

In the centre of the crowd an inflatable T-rex on a semi-clothed man’s shoulders offered me a sip of his beer.Click here for a full photo galleryRude not to really. I had to take a picture as apparently ‘T-Rex hates selfies.’

After a busy afternoon running between the stages the healing T area seemed like a great idea.

With an artistic giant skull made from recycled materials as a centrepiece this place was a haven for tired souls.

A place to relax and even get a massage before heading back into the chaos that is T in the Park.SATURDAY:The dress code on the second day of T in the Park was wellies and rain ponchos.

The intermittent showers turned the already heavily trodden ground to thick mud, especially in the campsite.

The weather didn’t stop three lads from showing themselves off as half naked Native Americans.

Leaving little to the imagination, Steven told me he bought his tight fitting leopard print leggings on holiday and his light up boa at the festival.

For a change of scene we headed to the Stand Comedy Club tent.

With no line-up available it was with some surprise and a lot of luck that we arrived in time to hear comedian John Cooper-Clark reading some of his poetry.

Highlights included a limerick that didn’t rhyme and wasn’t about anyone from Limerick and an impression of the Sopranos.

Next it was time for something even more unusual.

I was strapped into a giant inflatable orange to duke it out in an arena with three other inflatable oranges in a game of human dodgems.

I fell on my back at the first blow and struggled like a helpless turtle for a few minutes unable to right myself with my weak stomach muscles.

Then I came up with a brainwave rolling around the arena wildly until my momentum gave me the opportunity to right myself.

After a brief moment of victory, I was knocked back to the ground.SUNDAY:Day three and I was starting to feel a little worse for wear so I headed to the charity village for a free cuddle.

The girls at Love Specs were offering this much-needed service to weary revellers as well as selling their unique glasses to raise money for a Malawi girls orphanage.

I was somewhat revived when I noticed the paparazzi were tailing me again so I made a dash for the big wheel.

From on high I could take in the stunning views of Balado while listening to Kodaline playing the main stage below.

Down on the Sunset Strip the days of partying was evidenced by the piles of dropped takeaway food and rubbish.

The circling seagulls eyed the feast hungrily in a scene worryingly reminiscent to Hitchcock’s The Birds.

The festival can take its toll so a key thing to remember during a weekend of boozing is to top up on vitamins.

Churros dipped in chocolate sauce with a Galaxy Caramel milkshake sounded about right.

The sugar rush put me in the mood for a little exercise so I headed to the legendary disco shed for a game of swing ball.

Having not played since I was a child I wasn’t very good but I certainly wasn’t the only one.

Other shed activities included hula hooping, Jenga and boogieing while the bubbles flew overhead.

Having never been to T in the Park before I was impressed to find they have all you could wish for at a festival and more.

As the sun set on the final day and the exhausted crowds headed home or back to their tents for one last time it was sad to think with a new venue next year T in the Park will never be the same again.