Ahoy, me hearties! Mike Donachie and family enjoyed a short break with a difference aboard Edinburgh’s Four Sisters Boatel, which is billed as Scotland’s only “floating hotel.” Dragging along his wife and two young children, he filled the car with babycare junk and was already misusing nautical terms before they hit the motorway.
Stepping aboard the Four Sisters Boatel for the first time is a bit nerve-wracking.
Looking down at the gap between canal barge and floating dock, the mind immediately goes to places you don’t want it to. As you eye passing crisp packets and beer bottles suspiciously, you are utterly convinced you will fall in at any moment, and faintly surprised when it doesn’t happen.
For those of us trying a barge for the first time, the luxurious, reassuringly stable Four Sisters is the way to do it. Permanently moored on the Union Canal in Edinburgh, it is four-star self-catering accommodation providing a tiny bit of adventure in a very urban area. It’s also marvellous fun.
The “staycation” boom shows no sign of abating as we Scots spend our holidays discovering more about the country, and looking a bit shifty next to groups of Americans who very obviously know more about the place than we do.
Amid the rush to stay at home, tourism body Visitscotland has launched Unique Places To Stay, a guide to some of Scotland’s most unusual accommodation.
It offers some fascinating opportunities. There are the ultra-modern geodesic eco-domes overlooking Loch Linnhe in Argyll and, at the other end of the scale, the cottages at the beautiful Buchan Ness Lighthouse, built by Robert Louis Stevenson’s grandfather. The same guide promotes the cottage where Rob Roy was born and Comrie’s Swedish katas, like wigwams.
But all of those have one flaw they don’t provide an excuse to talk like a pirate.
So the boatel was selected and, miniature pirates in tow, the nervous step aboard the Four Sisters was taken.Boatel’s beginningsThe boatel is a story in itself. Owner Camillia McLachlan who starts her emails with “Ahoy!” retired from running a B&B just round the corner from the Union Canal and, with an eye for a new venture, bought a Brighton-made canal barge.
Initially planning to let people chug up and down the canal in it, she arranged for it to be lowered into the water at Sighthill and hopped aboard to steer it to its new home.
A stressful and incident-filled seven hours and 15 minutes later, ‘Skipper Cam’ prised her quivering hands from the controls and decided it would be a lot easier if it was a non-moving ‘boatel’.
Then the real work began. Cam rolled up her sleeves and transformed the old barge into a luxury experience. It’s all plasma TVs and blond wood inside, with a fully-equipped kitchen sorry, galley two cabins with double beds and two cute little bunks, just big enough for cabin boys (or girls).
Everything, especially the shower, is a tight fit the boat is only 55ft by 11ft and you can’t fit a quart into a pint pot but that’s part of the charm. It’s like a very posh caravan with added novelty value, not least because the portholes reveal the water level outside is somewhere around your waist.
The location, however, takes some getting used to. The boatel is moored just a few yards from the Cargo Bar, which has its front door on Fountainbridge. The spot is called Edinburgh Quay, with the start of the Union Canal and the Millennium Link, and Cargo’s outdoor seating.
Sitting on the tiny deck of the Four Sisters, it feels a bit like camping out in a beer garden, but it doesn’t take long for the benefits to become apparent.Amenities not farrr, me heartiesFor a start, you’re a 90-second walk from a licensed premises where they have so much beer that they’re willing to sell you some. The pub serves decent food, too, and less than 100 yards beyond it is, astonishingly, a Tesco.
All this while bobbing calmly on a canal, with swans glaring at you.
Walk a little further about 10 minutes away and there is Fountainbridge’s leisure park, with a cinema, an indoor play centre and restaurants including Nando’s. When heavy showers made Edinburgh Zoo unattractive, all these things were very handy.
The boatel’s home behind Cargo catches the best of both worlds, which is, of course, its main selling point. It’s entertaining accommodation with access to central Edinburgh the King’s Theatre is only a short walk away.
You can even arrange secure parking at £8 a day at the flats nearby. But if you do get aboard the boatel, remember it’s more than just a cottage or a caravan. It’s an experience in itself and it’s worth taking time to enjoy it.
A walk along the Union Canal which goes all the way to the Falkirk Wheel and you will see high-end flats and urban decay, side by side. The old Fountain Brewery, just a short walk away, is a sad example of redevelopment stalemated by recession.
As with any quiet spot in the centre of a big city, there’s something a bit strange but very restful about the area, with its cyclists, commuters and sundry wanderers. There are also all the other boats and barges some private, some hired out, coming and going all the time.
There’s huge novelty value in life on a barge, especially with children, as long as you’re very careful with them on deck. The dozens of items cleverly stowed away in nooks and crannies include child-sized life jackets which Cam is insistent must be used.
The boatel deserves its four stars, if only for the sheer effort its owner has put in. Cam has thought of everything, from an honesty bar to eco-friendly shampoo. But that level of effort, perversely, is partly to blame for the only niggling doubt aboard the boatel.Safety fears unfoundedIt is a canal barge, so it was never designed for such luxury.
Getting anything done there is a series of compromises, with so little space available. So, despite the undeniable luxury, you have to lower your expectations a little.
Sadly, the effort to think of everything has meant many of those things are simply in the way. Is there really a need for a crystal punch bowl with matching glasses, or for a full-sized wooden bar in the corner? Or for dozens of cooking utensils including seven different carving knives? For a family, the answer is no, although Cam’s corporate clients might disagree.
It may seem churlish to say so, but the service could do with being simplified a little. In the process of earning 10 out of 10 for effort, the boatel shaves a little off its rating for comfort.
But, overall, the Four Sisters is more compact than cramped. Open-minded visitors will find themselves very comfortable and, if it seems unkind to notice some furniture is from Ikea, it’s worth admitting it’s better quality than much of what we left at home.
As for the safety fears, they were, of course, unfounded. The barge hardly moves at all, even when light rain on its roof sounds apocalyptic inside. Even when the canal looked a bit more full than before, the Four Sisters was steadfast.
It’s a new venture a launch, if you like but the Four Sisters Boatel thoroughly deserves to be successful. Priced competitively with a Travelodge, at least until it becomes established, it’s an amazing experience and highly recommended.
Starting the first of several trips to lug all the baby equipment back to the car, that first, nervous step aboard was forgotten at first, amid light hops on and off the boat, laden with bags.
Our initial policy of handing the baby carefully between adults on to dry land was also forgotten, as he giggled and was jiggled while we sat on deck. It wasn’t until we were driving home that we realised nobody had even been in danger of falling in, walking the plank or being keelhauled.
We were almost disappointed.