If your allotted five minutes of fame has always eluded you, then do not miss Tuesday’s Courier.
We can’t promise you a glittering career in the limelight but we do have details of how you could secure at least a few precious seconds on the stage.
It is a rare opportunity to tread the boards so if you have always dreamt of having an Equity card there really is no better place to pick up your Tuesday fill of news and sport.
Meanwhile, I have promised you boffins and boy do I intend to deliver? (That, for the avoidance of doubt, is intended to be a rhetorical question. However, if you failed to realise that I can, at this stage, confirm that the answer is yes, yes I do).
It is not just a tale of everyday boffins (if indeed such boffins exist). No. This is the story of a phenomenal flu-based boffinry breakthrough. I strongly suggest that, if you haven’t already done so, you now indulge in a sharp intake of breath. And then resolve not to miss our startling Tuesday edition.
Ahh, the Scottish summer. A wonderful time to slip into the soothing waters off our coast (ahem). It sounds lovely but all too often one find oneself unwinding amid an array of unidentified floating objects.
But what’s this? The Marine Conservation Society has revealed a new report showing that the quality of the nation’s bathing waters is better than ever. Hurrah!
Meanwhile, an unholy rumpus has broken out over buses in Dundee. More specifically advertisements on the sides of said vehicles, More specifically still, advertisements urging locals to vote Yes in the referendum. If that’s still not specific enough I’m afraid you will just have to wait for Tuesday’s Courier for the full story (including lots of specifics, detail fans).
She’s a Lady, ooh-ooh-ooh, she’s a Lady.
I refer, naturally, to the old bird at Loch of the Lowes. We have worrying news of a brazen attempt to reach the nest containing her latest record-breaking egg (but don’t worry, the scoundrels were apprehended before any damage could be done). We have all the details.
On top of all that, we have the latest following the terrific cup exploits of Dundee United and St Johnstone, a census shock for Courier Country and the story of a local piper invited to play for Ghandi’s grandson.
It would be rude to say you would be mad to miss it, but you would be mildly foolish or at best misguided. That being the case I have quite literally no hesitation in urging you to snap up your copy of Tuesday’s Courier. Failing that, why not try our digital edition?