Everyone has verbal bad habits. But not everyone is aware that they do. Which is a pity, as these speech crimes can be annoying.
A common one is to add “know what I mean?” to the end of a statement. If someone says: “It costs £20, know what I mean?” then, yes, I’m fairly sure I understand. Twenty is the sum of my fingers and toes, isn’t it? While pounds sterling is, I’m fairly sure, a currency?
In Scotland, “ken?” might be substituted for “know what I mean?” Ken isn’t quite so annoying, but just as redundant. Ken?
Close relatives of the know-what-I-meaners are the “y’know” tribe. But y’knows tend to be scattered through speech. Not just, y’know, at the end of sentences.
Then there are the phrase-inserters. Those who repeatedly throw terms into their utterances such as: to be honest; honestly; actually; basically; I’m not gonna lie; I’m not being funny but; I’m telling you; I think you’ll find; at this present moment in time; or kerching (when talking about making money).
All are needless. All grate on the nerves when over-used.
A particularly bad example is the addition of “am I right?” to the end of a sentence. The person who says “am I right?” isn’t asking if they are factually correct, they are inviting you to laugh or admire their cleverness. I have to stop myself replying: “No! You are absolutely not right. You are a blithering idiot.”
The most common verbal bad habit is to repeatedly use em, erm, or ehh. It probably isn’t, erm, an exaggeration to say that most people do this. You can hear the difference when a trained speaker (a newscaster or broadcast journalist) interviews someone who, ehh, isn’t used to speaking in public.
I always feel a stab of disquiet about people who tell a story, then (at a crux point) say: “me being me” before telling you how wonderfully incisive or brave they were. They come across as a little too pleased with themselves.
A more comical, though closely related, statement comes when you are told a tale of a minor confrontation and hear the phrase: “I felt like saying…” Because the person relating the story clearly didn’t sally forth with their cutting witticism at the time. It was only later they thought of a sparkling rejoinder.
The worst verbal bad habit is to say “literally” when it isn’t appropriate. Your blood did not literally boil. She did not literally melt in his arms. The food was not literally out of this world.
I’m not being funny, but my brain literally explodes when I hear this. Know what I mean?
Word of the week
Crux (noun)
A main or central feature. EG: “If the crux of your story is an example of your own cleverness, tell a different story.”
Read the latest Oh my word! every Saturday in The Courier. Contact me at sfinan@dctmedia.co.uk
