Home schooling in the Duncan household is as easy as one, two, three. Or is it? Mary-Jane Duncan explains.
I’m currently spinning plates. That are on fire. With one hand tied behind my back. Blindfolded. Okay, not quite but that’s what it feels like. We are, of course, talking home schooling. Alongside working from home. With the mister on shifts. In between hospital appointments, dog walking and housework. Well housework is a fancy way to describe wheeching round a Swiffer and throwing about some Febreeze. Based on the amount of laundry, I’m going to assume there are people living here I’ve never met yet.
We’re ALL trying to adjust during this strange time where ‘normal’ has changed so completely. Especially now with tantalising hints at lockdown being eased and hospitality being reopened. For those, including myself, currently shielding, lockdown measures were extended until July 31. People keep asking me how it’s going – like I’ve ever had any idea how it’s going at any point never mind under these circumstances.
Home schooling here includes mathematics, English and (shudders) physics. Maths and I were never friends. We made an uneasy pact to see us through until amicably parting ways. Two of my girls have a similar relationship with maths, the remaining girl displays Sheldon-like tendencies and is our ‘go to’ for all our questions. She’s recently progressed to not sighing when we ask something. This is a sign of tolerance instead of despair.
So, currently rocking more of a Miss Trunchbull than Miss Honey vibe, MY kind of home schooling goes like this:
Maths. Rachel Riley covers this every weekday, four times an episode, during Countdown. Arithmetic and times tables! I even managed to get a number round that Rach didn’t. I should pop that on my CV. I need to work on my 75 times table but surely that’s beyond the normal requirements of the average 11-year-old? If she still struggles, I deploy the world-renowned ‘cookie mathematics’. Eg when you have three kids but only 10 cookies and can’t have them fighting about unfair distribution so you eat all 10 cookies because you’re a good parent. Job done!
English? Now that I CAN help with. We love reading and writing here and God bless whoever invented spell check. Middle kid gets on without issue and biggest kid has finished her Higher. Smallest kid and I love a cartoon or a wordsearch.
Geography. As a geography graduate, I have this covered. For the sake of visual props, I find watching A Place in the Sun and Escape to the Country advantageous. We watch the introductions, ascertain the budget (can I claim this also covers economics?) and then debate if the couple are nice enough to deserve the properties.
General knowledge. STV’s The Chase hopefully involves a question involving some war or Winston Churchill so it’s a double winner and history is covered too. A question on Greek mythology? Brilliant! That’s the Classics covered.
Home economics. An absolute BREEZE considering all the eating going on here. If ‘cheese toastie making’ was an exam we’d have three first class Masterchefs in our midst.
Middle kid was handed the challenge of weekly menu planning and has excelled. Come Dine With Me is an excellent back-up for ideas.
Business management and accounting. ‘Tipping Point’ adventures locks this down. Not only do they have to add/subtract monies BUT learn some risk management by choosing to pass OR answer the question. Exciting!
Modern studies has taken a bit of a swerve. We tried watching the news but unfortunately the number of profanities being issued by myself meant it became more of a Soc Ed class about the ‘dos and don’ts’ of Modern Day Etiquette.
Chemistry. Easy! Please pass Mum another cocktail.
