A Tayside man is leading a bid to use football as a way to break male silence surrounding the devastation of baby loss.
Fraser Rennie from Dundee has founded only the second team in Scotland to bring together dads, grandads, uncles and brothers who have endured the agony of stillbirth and neonatal death.
Every Sands United Dundee FC player will carry the name of a baby on their strip – in Fraser’s case that of his son, Jonathon Fraser Rennie. He and partner Ellie deGernier lost their baby son in August 2019 after he was born prematurely at 27 weeks and three days.
The football initiative is part of the work of the charity Sands. Fraser, 22, said it had been a great support to the couple from the outset.
“This group is not looking for amazing football players, it’s more just about getting men together to offer a peer support network where they can talk about their bereavement when they’re ready,” said Fraser.
“Jonathon was alive for three hours and when we lost him it was heart-breaking.
“I didn’t know where to turn and who to speak to, so by setting up this team it gives the opportunity for men to open up and speak to others when they may feel they have no-one to talk to.
“We are the only second team in Scotland so want to help the men of Dundee as much as possible.”
It’s hoped the team may play charity matches. Fraser is also hopeful local businesses may come on board with support.
He added: “The whole perception of men is they don’t speak about their feelings.
“I want to break that mental health barrier that it’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to be upset – it’s okay to cry.”
Nicholas Fitzpatrick, a fellow founding member said: “I think the team is important to bring grieving fathers together so that we can have people to open up to and talk about things with.”
The team can be reached through the Sands United FC Dundee Facebook page, on Twitter @SUFC_Dundee or by emailing sufcdundee@gmail.com
Every day in the UK, 14 babies are stillborn or die shortly after birth. Sands provides bereavement support services nationally and locally.
