ITV’s Love Island features a cast of impossibly beautiful twentysomethings.
And the premise of the show is ostensibly that islanders get a chance to find love.
Of course, there are easier ways to meet a romantic partner than subjecting yourself to the scrutiny and vitriol of the viewing public while your every move is beamed out to millions watching at home for weeks at a time.
The far greater draw for contestants is that once they leave the villa – with or without the love of their life – there is a good chance they will make a tidy living from brand endorsement deals.
I used to be a huge fan of the show. I was emotionally invested in the drama and dating-missteps of a group of strangers I’d never met.
But as Love Island became more established – and the hype intensified – the shine wore off.
There were questions about whether the show would continue after the deaths by suicide of two former contestants, as well as host Caroline Flack.
Women’s Aid also compelled to issue a statement after concerns about the behaviour of some of the men on the show.
And in recent years, there has also been criticism of the show for its lack of diversity.
It’s fair to say Love Island producers have a type.
Your wish is our command ❤️ #LoveIsland pic.twitter.com/qpD7tAasXX
— Love Island (@LoveIsland) July 24, 2022
Young and slim, muscley and Instagram-ready. The contestants don’t look like your average group of 20-year-olds.
Which is why I’m intrigued by a new Love Island-style pilot being developed that will feature older contestants looking for love.
Falling in love has no age limit
The working title for the show is ‘My Mum, Your Dad’.
It will involve a group of daters in their 40s and 50s living together and being coupled up by their kids behind the scenes.
I can see the appeal. Life and love doesn’t stop when you hit the ripe old age of 39.
Middle-age isn’t some arbitrary cut-off point where Cupid turns up at your door and issues you with a cease and desist letter forbidding you from engaging in young people activities like flirting and falling in love.
It’s telling that most of the negative reaction we have seen to reports of the new show have involved sentiments which amount to: ‘’eww, nobody wants to watch old people getting frisky!’’
This is where show producers are missing a trick.
They want to make a bold programme that shows older contestants with life experience and normal bodies finding love.
But instead of a sexy, provocative programme that replicates the original, they’re adding this – frankly, patronising – element of involving children in their parent’s romantic lives.
Why can’t Susan (45) from Liverpool pick her own date, like the young ones on Love Island are trusted to do? Why does she need her Gen X son to work as gatekeeper?
#LoveIsland 'to launch series for singletons over 40 with normal bodies' after pressure from public https://t.co/v15EbEtrQz
— OK! Magazine (@OK_Magazine) July 20, 2022
Maybe Susan has a thing for bearded bad boys.
Instead, her son thinks the mild-mannered accountant from Leeds would be a much better fit.
His mum probably hasn’t even THOUGHT about sex since 1999, so physical attraction isn’t that important.
He’s bound to pick a future stepdad on the basis of Lego collection, not how flustered Susan gets by the strong forearms and come-to-bed eyes of Brian The Bearded.
Will middle-aged Love Island have different challenges?
One show insider said that the older contestants would bring ‘’intelligent conversation’’ to the programme and it would be a chance for them to ‘’let their hair down, while they still feel in their prime.’’
Which is a roundabout way of telling viewers to expect crossword marathons, rather than marathon snogging sessions.
One staple of Love Island is that contestants are set challenges. The details change but – spoiler alert – they usually involve lots of free-for-all kissing and gyrating.
Given what we know about middle-aged Love Island so far, I fear that producers will have different plans for the oldies.
Maybe a challenge that involves the men showing how alluring they can be while emptying the dishwasher.
Or a passionate paperwork session as contestants sort out receipts for a tax return.
If they’re lucky, they might get the chance to have a steamy night on the sofa with back-to-back episodes of Murder She Wrote.
Middle-aged people do not need paternalistic intervention to be on a dating show
If you’re going to do something, do it properly.
Middle-aged people were having sex and falling in love long before the Love Island generation.
They’ve seen more and done more – whether or not their kids like to dwell on that fact.
They are more than capable of being the feature of a compelling dating programme without the paternalistic intervention of their sprogs and young television researchers.
So I’ll watch this new programme, on one condition.
The fact that the contestants know what a VHS is and remember life before the internet shouldn’t influence the format.
I’m sure these parents love their children very much but they don’t need to be involved in their dating decisions.
They can scroll through TikTok while the middle-aged daters embark on an exciting quest for love.
But if they young ones do tune in, they might find they actually learn a thing or two about dating and relationships.
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