There’s something about a cold Monday in winter.
Something not altogether pleasant.
But what’s this? A newspaper to take away the blues?
A publication so crammed with news, sport and features that the words literally tumble out of the packed pages and on to the pavement below (not literally)?
A paper described (by me) as the “finest thing of any kind ever”?
That’s right.
And, even better, it is now my unrivalled pleasure to introduce you to some of the delights that are GUARANTEED to have you turning cartwheels in the street (again, not literally).
For starters, how about the story of the woman who has totted up a whopping £18,500 in parking fines all for parking in her own driveway.
Madness gone mad?
Judge for yourself on perusing the pages of the nation’s finest newspaper (a title quite remarkably which is still to be officially conferred).
If you get fed up of people and would quite like to spend at least a portion of the day reading about animals then good Lord, you are in the right place (or at least you will be the time the newsagent opens the door tomorrow morning to find you eager-faced and impatient at the front of a very long queue, 75p clutched in your mitt).
We have a story of the fantastic Mr fox snapped in a Dundee garden.
Said fox can be seen relaxing in a big hedge, with what can only be described as a supercilious look on its face.
Meanwhile, we also have the very latest on the eagle owl which has been spreading fear and alarm in a Perthshire community.
We hear from the dog walker who is repeatedly swooped upon by said winged beast.
It’s like something out of Harry Potter (kind of).
If (if – ha!) you are a fan of the Singing Kettle then we have unmissable news for you.
The (virtual) hammer has come down after the (virtual) auction of some (literal) Kettle paraphernalia.
But how much did said memento achieve?
Find out in a Courier which is filled with childish wonder (along with a wide range of high-brow and erudite news and analysis).
You won’t know this, but when I started writing these short few paragraphs I set out with the intention of taking you on a journey. That journey leads from a cold, dark, unwelcoming place (Monday) to a world crammed with wonder (The Courier). I do hope you enjoyed the journey. To arrive at your final destination (well aware the metaphor has been stretched too far now) please do snap up your copy of the paper. Failing that, why not try our digital edition?