By choosing Wednesday’s Courier from the newsstands you will be taking the nuclear option.
But in a quite wonderful way.
That’s because we have news of the Perthshire nuclear bunker snapped up by none other than BBC boffin Brandon Butterworth. He paid £150,000 for the unusual property.
But why?
Find out in The Courier.
Perhaps Mr Butterworth is looking for a hideout in which to ensconce himself during the Ryder Cup.
We have details of a “ring of steel” set to be thrown up around Gleneagles for the golfing extravaganza amid potential heightened terrorism threats.
Scary stuff. But ramblers think it’s a piece of nonsense. Make up your own mind after reading your favourite daily newspaper (I mean The Courier, by the way).
In Wednesday’s edition you can also meet the man who dreamt of being a dentist but ended up lifting the European Cup. Which was not a bad second prize. Now, some five decades later, he is living the dream as a dentist in Stirling. Astonishing stuff and a really rather cracking read.
We also have news about the prevalence of inactive kids and (in unrelated news) depressed mums. Not the most upbeat, I confess.
However, when you throw in the story of a Perthshire lass who unwittingly played a part in the abolition of slavery and the heartwarming tale of a young osprey which has returned to Courier Country following its first winter abroad I think you will find yourself with little or no option but to agree it’s an altogether alluring news package.
And that, dear reader, is before you add sport into the mix.
Speaking of which, we have details of a change in Paul Hartley’s management team at Dundee. Most interesting.
Meanwhile, Dundee United may not have seen the last of a popular player at the club. Which is nice.
Christian Dailly gives his verdict on the cup final, and Steve Scott reports from the first day of practice at the BMW PGA at leafy Wentworth. Lovely.
A winning Wednesday awaits our readers so make sure you are counted among them. If you don’t fancy print, then why the devil not try our digital edition?