I would describe it as bumper, but that could lead me open to action by the trades description act bods.
It would, they would likely rule, represent a ludicrious understatement.
Saturday’s Courier is, in fact, a veritable juggernaut of a newspaper.
So much so that those with weak arms may be advised to avoid altogether (or instead “pick up” our lightweight digital edition).
Among the top attractions in the weighty offering are pictures of a wrestler from yesteryear in his pants.
It’s all part of plans for a tribute at the Caird Hall in Dundee which those of a certain vintage will be well aware used to be something of a wrestling Mecca. And indeed will be again when Hell For Lycra comes to town…
Don’t miss it, grapplers.
Meanwhile, if you are set to celebrate the weekend with a little tipple and are of a certain age then beware we have alarming news about the excessive imbibing of those in middle age.
In fact, they are supping far more than those of younger generations.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it (while wearing your cardigan and comfy slippers) oldies.
We also have news of a trial to introduce iPads to prosecutors in court.
Sounds like a good plan.
It’s already been trialled in three courts, which again sounds reasonable.
The cost of said trial?
£310,000.
In fact an eye-watering £310,000.
Oof.
We have all the details.
Meanwhile, oh dear, what can the Blatter be?
We bring you up to date on all the shenanigans within Fifa following another remarkable/shameful (you decide) meeting/debacle (you decide).
* For more on all of these super Saturday stories be sure to snap up your copy of The Courier, or why not try our aforementioned digital edition.