As the days increasingly have a feeling of groundhog, it’s natural to let our minds wander to a day when we can go on holiday.
An actual, get-on-a-plane, sun, sea and cocktails-with-umbrellas holiday.
Can you imagine?
After a year-plus of inertia, some excitement.
Travel! Passports! Fun and laughter! I feel a Cliff Richard song coming on.
And then the politicians go and spoil it all (I know, I know, it’s a serious matter, we have to stay put if it means saving lives) by suggesting we’ll actually only be able to vacation in the UK by summer.
One of those staycation jobs.
Let’s look at the pluses.
We can boost our home economy by staying in the UK, or closer still in Scotland.
And we’ll save on air fares.
I found a “Staycation Special” supplement and looked for the Scottish options.
One caught my eye – a Scottish safari where instead of spotting lions and elephants, you looked for red squirrels, deer, ospreys and dolphins in the Highlands.
Not much could trump the thought of an infinity pool, Pina Colada and kids club in order to enjoy the first two – but it would, I considered, actually be amazing, especially if it was warm and sunny.
You even got a chef to cook for you round a fire during a night of camping.
Then I came to the price and was certain they’d put the decimal in the wrong place.
Read more from Martel Maxwell here
£6,800 for seven nights. Per person.
I still cannot get over this, I was waking in the small hours, wondering if I should call to see if there was a ‘0’ too many.
There are holidays in Scotland to suit all budgets I suppose – I just had no idea anyone had a budget like that.
A camper van, I’ve always thought had a certain romance to it – blowing with the wind, with no fixed plan, stumbling on the Scottish wilderness less travelled . . .
But then I remember, my friend had the same idea a couple of years back and after 20 minutes in the van with her husband and two young kids, she knew she’d made a mistake. She didn’t go into details.
Well, she did a bit and her stories were hilarious – I’m just not convinced they are entirely suitable for a family newspaper.
Ask me if you see me in a pub.
There’s a thought.
I can’t wait to go to a pub. In fact, a pub will do.
One afternoon in a beer garden in Dundee or the Ferry with my husband or pals.
Or even by myself.
Anything. Something. Soon.
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