Picture the scene, if you will. There is a fridge at your work. It needs defrosting.
Instead of doing it yourself, you hire a contractor from if not a galaxy far, far away then certainly a good few miles apart. Sensible policies for a happier Britain or madness gone mad? You decide after reading Wednesday’s chilling Courier.
Meanwhile, we reveal full details of a new role for Brian Cox.
Suffice to say he is currently perfecting his barking technique. Walkies.
Meanwhile, we have the remarkable story of the 11 year-old boy who romped home in a major 5K race. Find out what inspired the talented youngster to his astonishing triumph.
A dog has collapsed while out on the hills sparking a major search and rescue operation. Full dramatic tale in Wednesday’s wild edition.
The Black Watch Museum has thrown its doors open to the public. Find out what the first few people through the door make of the new £3.5 million Perth attraction.
An MSP has flagged up concern over gay marriage, raising the hypothetical issue of a devoutly religious woman married to a man who then seeks a sex change. He fears that, because the woman would presumably be opposed to divorce on religious grounds, she could be left with no alternative but to be stuck in a gay marriage.
Confused? Wednesday’s Courier has all the answers.
In sport, 17 pages of sport features four on Wimbledon, as we look back on a day when the two leading British women played their first rounds.
There’s also a preview of Andy Murray’s second round clash.
The last Lions’ midweek match was a success, with the Scots showing up well.
In football, a St Johnstone striker is on the move, a Dundee defender admits the Dark Blues will have to deal with the favourites’ tag next season, and we have the latest news on Dunfermline.
For more on all of these stories see Wednesday’s Courier or why not try our digital edition?