“Are you OK?” I asked a friend on FaceTime this week.
He told me he’s fed up with the question.
Just because he’s single, it doesn’t mean he’s depressed or desperate.
In fact, he’s relishing doing whatever he wants – going for a walk in his local park in Glasgow, sitting out the back or watching box sets 24/7 if he so chooses.
And he’s thanking his lucky stars he no longer lives with the ex who had an obsession with cleaning, resulting in real anger if the tins in the cupboard weren’t in lines depending on category (soup, sauce, etc) or had labels facing forward.
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He feared making tomato soup and yet, on the face of it, they were the perfect couple.
Depending on life circumstance, our experiences of lockdown vary enormously.
Scroll through Twitter and it seems those without young kids have found a calmness and hours to do all the things they always wanted to – meditate, sort through years’ worth of digital photos to be printed, learn Spanish, read books, take up yoga.
Part of me envies the vast amount of time stretching before them.
I can’t go to the toilet without a wee one on my ankle.
I wouldn’t have it any other way and count my blessings often – but also understand the relief that comes with kids’ bed times and the compulsion to inhale a bottle of wine.
Everyone has a status – single, married, retired, under 25, over 50 and so on. It’s easy to make assumptions but, as the old adage goes, you never know what happens behind closed doors.
And now, doors are closed for periods of time never before known.
There’s a dark side to this and I won’t be alone in being kept awake at night worrying about those who fear their own homes, whether victims of domestic abuse – physical, mental and often both – at the hands of a partner, or the unthinkable: helpless children abused or neglected by the very people who should love and protect them.
We hope social services are more alert than ever to the dangers faced and family and friends do not fear speaking up and out for those who can’t.
Those who can help, you have never been more important to the vulnerable people in Dundee and beyond.
And anything you can do now, more than ever, is as valuable as any frontline staff we applaud every week.
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