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THE BREAKDOWN, STEVE SCOTT: The truth is we’re doomed to have our nerves shredded by Scotland

Moments of joy like this always come with an assault on the nerves.
Moments of joy like this always come with an assault on the nerves.

Despite being warned by a rather angry ex-captain this week that we should “ban the use of those two words”, thoughts have wandered back to 1990.

Yes, it’s far too early to be speaking of G*@!d S%@$s. Scotland are cosy favourites (again) in Cardiff this week, but after last year’s ridiculous game against Wales I’m wary of unseen calamities, especially in the cauldron of the Principality.

Like Marcus Smith until Saturday, the new Scotland felling the old tombstones – winning in Wales, Twickenham, Paris for the first time in eons – have done so without a hostile crowd against them.

Those three wins were all in Covid-cleared stadia. You have to wonder whether it was a crucial difference – we may be about to find out.

Nothing is ever easy

But it’s the way that Slam was won 32 years ago that got me thinking. Those four games were all won by millimetres. The whole thing was a stressful knife-edge from start to finish. Nothing was every easy.

It was partly the way the game was played in those days, partly the personnel Scotland had. The 1984 Slam team were, it has to be said, premier entertainers compared to 1990. That team, for all we’ll treasure them fondly forever, were all grit and guts.

Are the 2022 team cut from the same cloth? The pack are, pretty much. The `90ers never had a Finn, a Duhan, a Darcy, a Hoggy. But they had their moments – the famous Tony Stanger try in the Calcutta Cup game of 1990 was scripted and executed as effectively as Ben White’s score on Saturday.

(Short digression: You couldn’t imagine the `90ers doing the double-kick move for the penalty try, but then again few teams of any cloth have ever tried that. We will surely look back on those sublime Russell cross-kicks in decades to come with the same joy and wonder as “The Pass” from 2018).

The resilience is great, but…

Scotland had resilience in buckets against England, and it’s become a common theme of this team. They needed it to win in Paris and against Australia, and it was even there in the losses to Wales and Ireland last year.

They’ve only visibly wilted in the last year in the game against South Africa in November.

But for the predictable romps over Italy and Tonga in 2021, absolutely nothing has been easy for Scotland in the past 18 months. You find yourself longing for just one easy run – a final quarter of a game when the fingernails are not being bitten to the quick.

But perhaps what happened in 1990 underlines that even for a successful Scotland, this is not in the DNA. The occasions – Dublin in the 1984 Slam season for example – when it’s all been one long celebration are rarer than Hamish Watson missing a tackle.

Instead, we’re doomed to hang on waiting for a last minute turnover from Darcy Graham (really?) and a Hogg boot into the upper stand. Any further triumphs between now and mid-March are going to be the same.

Chin up and buckle up. It’s not as if we’re not used to it.

Eddie’s Smith decision was perfectly logical

Poor, beleaguered, under-pressure Eddie Jones is predictably getting it from all angles for decisions on Saturday.

He even suggested himself this week that 95 times out 100, on that balance of play, England would have beaten Scotland. Which is surely a tacit admission he made the crucial difference.

Eddie’s getting particular pelters for removing Marcus Smith at 10. There’s some logic to this view – after all, Smith has been an incredible force in hauling Harlequins back from certain doom on multiple occasions in his brief career.

However, I’m with Eddie’s logic on this. England led 17-10, their pack had gained ascendancy. Jones was just doubling down on the control option. George Ford, with a similar pack performance, piloted England to victory in similar conditions two years ago.

Marcus had a decent game, not as wondrous as some are claiming. Some of his tactical kicking was a bit aimless and he missed an easy kick to the corner. He would have had zero influence on the plays leading to the penalty try.

Many of Jones’ decisions on selection and tactics can rightly be scrutinised. Replacing Smith isn’t really one of them.

Why have the BBC dropped Brian Moore?

I’m not alone – across the board, all nationalities – in being mystified that Brian Moore will no longer be doing men’s Six Nations commentaries for the BBC.

Mooro’s long been the best in-game analyst not just in rugby, but over many sports.

He’s dead right more often than not. For me even if he had even a frisson of English bias at times, that was okay. Given the memory of Moore the player, one was always surprised to find him as magnanimous as he so often was.

The distance from his playing days may have been a factor in the decision. I’m also told that as the BBC now have only the rights to Wales and Scotland 6N games, a “native” voice is preferred.

I hope that Brian’s often outspoken presence on Twitter is not a reason for him being sidelined. It shouldn’t at all, and hasn’t anything to do with his rugby output.

Watching Saturday’s game back, it’s clear the BBC needs to make the commentary box a little less crowded. Brian, Chris Paterson and now Nigel Owens were fighting for space in between Andrew Cotter’s lead role.

Nigel’s there in a straight steal of the US networks’ use of former NFL referees to explain decisions. Is this overkill? Rugby’s rules (laws if you must) are often a shade of impenetrable grey. All other sports are generally black and white.

Plus, while Nigel is a super guy, I can’t see him criticising his former mates too much. Which kind of defeats the point of having him there.