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It couldn’t get any verse unpublished McGonagall poems at Ig Nobel Show

It couldn’t get any verse  unpublished McGonagall poems at Ig Nobel Show

Dundee University is hosting the Ig Nobel Show, the annual celebration of the most fascinating, funny and downright odd achievements in science, technology and the arts including never-seen-before verse from Dundee’s most notorious poet.

It was on the 6th July, and in the year of 1893,There was a grand Horse Parade in the City of Dundee,In respect of the Royal Wedding, which was magnificent to see,And the beautiful sights filled the citizens’ hearts with glee.

The bells of the Old Steeple a merry peal rang out,Which caused the school children with joy to shout,And the Town House on the High Street was beautiful to view,It was decorated with crimson cloth and true blue.

Your mind will no doubt be reeling from the above assault on your eyeballs, dear Courier reader. We can only apologise for this.

These verses represent the first two stanzas of The Horse Parade; or Demonstration, in Respect of the Royal Wedding. They were penned in 1893 by the man widely regarded as the world’s most wretched poet, William Topaz McGonagall.

This, and several other unpublished McGonagall poems were unearthed last year by historian and Courier journalist Norman Watson. Some will blame him for this.

It’s been more than a century since they’ve even been heard in public but that’s going to change on Saturday night when The Horse Parade and several other unpublished McGonagall works are recited at the Ig Nobel Awards at Dundee University.

The Ig Nobel prizes date back to 1991, when they were founded in America to recognise discoveries that “cannot, or should not, be reproduced.” Although they sometimes veer into satire or veiled criticism (as with awarding the ‘science education’ award to Kansas and Colorado State Boards of Education for their very backward stance on the teaching of evolution) with a very few exceptions, the awards are given for genuine discoveries.

They were the brainchild of Marc Abrahams, Guardian columnist, editor of the Annals of Improbable Research, and a man who has been called America’s ‘guru of academic grunge.’

Over the years, winning breakthroughs have included the somewhat disturbing discovery that the presence of humans tends to sexually arouse ostriches, that black holes fulfil all the technical requirements to be Hell and research on the five-second rule the tongue-in-cheek belief that it’s safe to eat food that’s been dropped on the floor, as long as you pick it up within five seconds.

Each year, 10 category winners are given out in areas including peace, economics and literature. The prizes are presented at Harvard University and, afterwards, current and former award winners go on a world tour to showcase their achievements.

The Ig Nobel Show came to Dundee for the first time last year when highlights included a demonstration of a bra that doubles as a gas mask and of research into the medical side effects of sword swallowing.

Last year also saw Andre Geim become the first individual ever to win a Nobel Prize and an Ig Nobel Prize. The Dutch-Russian physicist won the former for his experiments with the substance graphene and the latter for using magnets to levitate a frog.

Speakers at tomorrow’s event will include Ig Nobel founder Marc Abrahams; gas-mask bra inventor Elena Bodnar; Chris McManus, who won an Ig Nobel prize for his study, Scrotal Asymmetry in Man and in Ancient Sculpture; and Kees Moeliker, who picked up his Ig Nobel for documenting the first scientifically recorded case of homosexual necrophilia between mallard ducks.

The evening will end with audience and presenters taking to their feet to recite the concluding lines of McGonagall’s most famous poem, The Tay Bridge Disaster.

Apart from that, it should be an excellent evening.

The Ig Nobel Awards Show takes place tomorrow in the Dalhousie Building at the University of Dundee at 6pm. Tickets cost £5/£3 and are available by going to www.dundee.ac.uk/tickets and clicking on “other lectures,” from the eigth floor of the University Tower Building, or by calling 01382 386669 or emailing revealingresearch@dundee.ac.uk

Please note, the show may not be suitable for primary age children.