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MIKE DONACHIE: ‘Disneyfication’ of Auld Reekie reaches new depths at Hogmanay

stay home
Fireworks are launched from Edinburgh Castle at midnight during the Hogmanay New Year celebrations.

Happy New Year! Or, if you’ve been in Edinburgh lately, happy Officially-Approved McHogmanay Bellsfest, presented In association with Haggis McBurgers Ltd., a subsidiary of Funcorp International Inc. (all rights reserved).

The Disneyfication of Auld Reekie reached new depths last week with a public debate about whether it’s OK for people to apply to a private company for permission to access their own homes using public streets.

Here’s my hot take on this: it bloody well is not OK.
Some Edinburgh residents expressed concerns about having their neighbourhoods turned into a theme park by big business.

In response, the authorities, business and, disturbingly, a prominent Edinburgh newspaper suggested the economy is more important than their quality of life. Nonsense.
Already, Edinburgh can be a difficult place to live. In August, for example, many residents simply leave.

The alternative is, when popping out for milk, to be accosted by some braying Tarquin who’s presenting free-form improv in a phone box for 70 quid a ticket.

I couldn’t live with it. I’d be up before the beak for punching jugglers before you could say “jolly authentic Scotch experience, Tabitha”.
Edinburgh’s Hogmanay has become a Frankenstein’s monster of street drinking, fireworks and celebrity guests that make you chirp: “Oh, I remember him!” The head of organising company Underbelly has pledged to talk with locals in search of balance, which is encouraging but also easy to say when you have a licence to print money.
I’m not being the fun police. I dislike NIMBYism.

I’ve been to Edinburgh’s Hogmanay many times, staying with friends in the city centre, and I know most residents enjoy it, or at least tolerate it.

Its growth is a testament to Scotland’s entrepreneurial spirit and tradition of hospitality, and I agree we should take care not to kill the golden goose. Plenty of cities would love Edinburgh’s success.
But balance would indeed be good. So would common sense, and a renewed focus on the needs of residents.

The alternative is to end up like Venice, which has depressingly few actual residents and exists only for tourism, like a fading star repeating catchphrases on demand.