Lonely, depressed, and withdrawn, Gordon Smith was struggling with his mental health and in desperate need of help.
The Glenrothes grandad was at his lowest ebb during lockdown in August 2021 and had no idea where to turn.
“I wasn’t coping,” reflects the 60-year-old. “My life seemed to be going nowhere and I didn’t know what to do about it.
“I hadn’t spoken a word to anyone in ages and I was starting to think life was worthless.”
Under constant pressure
Gordon’s sons had moved away from Fife – so he rarely saw them – and the constant pressure of being a carer for his 82-year-old mum was taking its toll.
He needed time out – a space where he could meet other people, and where he could open up and enjoy himself.
When he was invited along to The Friendship Cabin in Glenrothes two years ago, he was full of scepticism.
He was anxious, too, fearing he wouldn’t have the confidence to talk to people.
Gordon’s mood soon lifted
After a bit of gentle coaxing from manager Pearl Weepers, Gordon agreed to give it a bash. He struggled initially, but soon after joining he found his mood was lifting, and that he was getting his zest for life back.
The best thing about it? The singing and dancing! These weekly sessions, run by the charity Music in Hospitals and Care and its musician David Hood, put a huge smile back on Gordon’s face and a massive spring in his step.
Charity music project saved Gordon’s life
The father-of-six and grandfather-of-two is adamant that the charity music project “saved his life”.
“My life seemed to be going nowhere,” reflects Gordon. “I was in a very bad place due to family problems.
“I’ve been a carer for my mum for the last 15 years and things were getting on top of me. I just wasn’t coping.
“I wanted to get out into the community to speak to people and make new friends but I didn’t know where to begin.
“When Pearl, the volunteer co-ordinator, invited me along to the Friendship Cabin in August 2021, I was depressed and really at my lowest.
“It was hard work and for the first few weeks, I didn’t think it was for me. I didn’t feel I was fitting in with people and it was a real struggle. But I decided to keep at it.
“I had nothing else to go to – and soon enough I began really enjoying it, speaking more, and meeting friendly people. My confidence slowly started to grow.”
The healing power of live music
But it was the music that really lifted Gordon’s spirits and helped him to forget his worries. When he met David, who entertains folk at the Friendship Club with his guitar, he found he was in his element.
“I love music and I love to try to sing – and dance,” says Gordon.
“I used to play the accordion when I was younger and play the side drum in a band, so I can keep a beat.
“David really helped bring me out of myself and I found that being there with music, singing and dancing, was so good for my mental health.
Music sparked memories
“It helped calm me down, and the music sparked a lot of great memories.
“David certainly knows how to get people going and if you have an off day, he’s sure to pick you up.
“The Friendship Club and the live music changed my life. I dread to think what would’ve happened if I hadn’t been able to go there. It’s frightening!”
Top tunes played at the club include Roy Orbison’s Penny Arcade and Neil Diamond’s Sweet Caroline.
“We go mad for that!” says Gordon. “Everyone is up on their feet, singing and dancing. If they’re not, I’ll go round and haul them up!
“It’s such a great feeling! Even folk with Zimmer frames are up on their feet!”
Around 75% of centre users are women, says Gordon, but the hope is that more men will be encouraged to head along.
Being Santa
Gordon took on the coveted role of Santa in 2021, and he’s planning to do so again this Christmas. “Folk say I’ve got the belly for it!” he laughs.
“I love dressing up and seeing people happy and smiling. I do a few ‘ho ho hos’ and ring a bell. Everyone loves it.”
Gordon’s mum comes along to the centre once a week – and she too loves to have a wee jive.
The Friendship Club and the live music changed my life. I dread to think what would’ve happened if I hadn’t been able to go there. It’s frightening!”
As for Gordon, he’s become part of the fabric of the place and is now a board director for The Friendship Cabin.
And when Pearl asked if he fancied running quizzes at the centre, he jumped at the opportunity.
Sense of direction
It’s having this newfound sense of direction that’s helped him to flourish.
“Pearl and David gave me the chance to come out of myself,” he reflects. “It’s changed me as a person – it’s saved my life.
“Music just seems to lift things. You focus on enjoying it and living for the here and now.
“Pearl calls me her right-hand man these days and I’m more than happy to step in when she’s away.”
Improving health and wellbeing
The music sessions are run by Music in Hospitals & Care, a charity that improves the health and wellbeing of children and adults through the healing power of live music.
This includes those living with dementia, mental health problems, or who are seriously ill.
During Christmas their musicians run festive live music sessions right across the UK to lift the spirits of people in hospitals, hospices, care homes, day centres, special schools and community settings.
The Friendship Cabin offers a caring, friendly, stimulating, and welcoming service that allows vulnerable adults to socialise, relax and enjoy a variety of activities in Glenrothes. It is part of Fife Council’s voluntary Warm Welcome scheme. For further information, contact Pearl Weepers on 07423 154632.
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