Beware the injured golfer, goes the time-honoured cliché. The US team at Le Golf National yesterday seemingly tried to elevate that to new levels.
If they’re being serious, which was not entirely convincing given that Bubba Watson did most of the talking.
First, as the sun rose grudgingly into a chilly Parisien morning, Tiger Woods seemed to be suffering from some stiffness as he arrived the US team’s official photocall. Given the great man’s medical history is enough to make the most stoic of men wince, there was an obvious reaction, but US skipper Jim Furyk shrugged his shoulders.
“It’s actually news to me right there to be honest with you,” he said. “There are no issues reported or anything that I’m worried about.
“I was a little stiff on the way to the range, too, this morning because it was about 42 degrees. I watched him play a few holes. He doesn’t look stiff at all.
“So I think it’s probably just some folks maybe guessing or, you know, he’s probably stretching.”
That was okay then, but then we saw Justin Thomas’ wrist was still strapped, which suggested he wasn’t over the problem that affected him this last month.
“It’s fine, it looks worse than it is,” said the US team rookie. “It’s white tape on top of K tape, so it’s just prevention.
“It didn’t hurt last week. If I’m needed to (play all five series) than I’ll go five.”
That was okay too, it seems, but then we had Bubba, who seemed even more confused than normal, and suggested – initially at least – that half the team was down with a bug.
To start with Bubba was wearing a bright blue glove to his set interview, which he suggested – in a deep croaking voice – was part of a team bonding exercise doing “dumb stuff”.
“Got to have something to do,” he said. “Golf gets boring after awhile. Like Justin said, it’s a long year, we’re all tired.
“You can tell, my voice, I’m exhausted. A lot of us (in Atlanta) were kind of getting sick – I don’t want to say not quite half the field had something, and then you know, traveling all the way over here, we’re all battling something.”
Are there any more players struggling, he was asked. “I could care less about them, I’m trying to get me healthy,” he said.
Whether the US locker room is awash with strepsils or this was just Bubba being Bubba remains in some doubt as Jordan Spieth looked mystified at suggestions the glove was a team prank and that another of the team had been ordered to say certain words in interviews.
“I don’t even know anything about it. He just was in the locker room and said, “I think I’m going to wear my glove in media.”,” said Spieth, who might not be on the same wavelength as his fellow former Masters champion.
Bubba had been speaking about how physics whiz Bryson DeChambeau used “longer words” than him to get to the same point just as Spieth, having waited to let his team-mate finish his last stream of consciousness, replaced him in the interview desk.
“Yeah, you may use short words, but you sure use a lot of them,” was his classic putdown.
