At this time of year we tend to see predictions for the next 12 months based on the alignment of the stars.
What a lot of rubbish.
What effect will the Sun crossing the celestial equator have?
And what dangers do the positions of the water signs in relation to the fire signs hold?
I’ll tell you: zero.
Astrology, the Zodiac, your “sign” have no bearing on anything at all.
Horoscopes – all that Pisces, Sagittarius, Capricorn stuff – are fake.
And I can prove it.
Long ago and far far away, I worked for a newspaper which (like most papers) carried a horoscope column.
The lady who wrote it was a lovely person, but incredibly inconsistent.
Sometimes she wrote a two-page essay on a star sign. Other times just one sentence. Sometimes just a few words: “You will feel powerful on Thursday”, or: “Delay a decision until Jupiter ascends”.
This was inconvenient for sub-editors tasked with printing four lines of text for every sign.
Cutting long ones wasn’t a problem, that’s what sub-editors do.
Lengthening short ones wasn’t difficult either, we just made stuff up in the usual horoscope language.
“You’ll be feeling anxious about a forthcoming event”.
“Don’t let any decision be affected by previous bad experiences”.
Did we check the precession of the equinoxes, the triplicities, or essential dignity of any planet’s zodiac position?
I think you know the answer.
Fake horoscopes are no basis for big decisions
On a few occasions, our horoscopes lady failed to supply copy at all.
Rather than an empty space in the paper we dug out examples from a couple of years previously, mixed them up a bit, and printed them.
Scorpio: A man in a hot dog suit will try to hand you a flyer. Take it. Your fate is to eat modestly discounted hot dogs.
— Sorrow-scopes (@Sorrowscopes) December 18, 2022
The total number of people who wrote in to complain these “invented” horoscopes were inaccurate was . . . again, I think you can guess.
Astrology has no scientific validity and no value.
I want to labour that point: there is absolutely no accuracy to horoscope-generated advice, predictions, or character assessment.
This is a pseudoscience. A sham, a fraud, a cheat.
You’d be as well making decisions based on the shape of stones on Broughty beach or the pattern of leaves on a Lochee Park tree.
Newspapers print horoscopes every day, and there is little wrong with that.
It is a bit of fun, something to have a laugh with during your coffee break.
But would you pay attention to this pseudoscience when making a really important decision?
Worse, would you pay to learn whether you, born at 5.35 am on a particular day, will find lasting love with a person born at 2.30 pm on a day three months later in the year?
If you require life advice, ask the opinion of a level-headed friend or family member.
Do not, please, pay anyone for an opinion based on fakery.
I’ll repeat, just in case I haven’t quite got my message across: horoscopes are utter nonsense.
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