A couple who adopted their son through Fife Council have accused its social work department of withholding “shocking” information – including the claim the then toddler was left in a house with a dead baby for days while in foster care.
Sharon, 54, and James Menzies, 60, who welcomed the then three-year-old into their home in 2009, claim these experiences have contributed to severe mental health issues and violent behaviours in their adopted child.
We are not naming the boy, who is now 19 years old and still shares a home with his adopted parents after proving unable to live without support.
While Sharon and James stress they “adore” their adopted son, they say his unresolved trauma has led to him punching them, threatening them with knives and destroying thousands of pounds of personal possessions in their home.
Why are Sharon and James angry?
The couple were already parents to three teenage children when they adopted the boy in 2014.
Sharon and James were living in Leven at the time of the adoption but later moved to Kinneswood in Perth and Kinross.
They say the “lack of transparency” from Fife Council means they were unprepared for the “profound challenges ahead”.
The couple’s lives have been “upended as we navigated his trauma, fought for resources, and sacrificed careers and personal time to support him.”
Fife Council’s social work department has “shirked their responsibilities” and “provided little support”, the couple allege.
Sharon and James are speaking out now because they can no longer afford their son’s weekly private therapist, which they say is “critical to his well-being and development”. They believe the local council should cover the costs.
What did the boy experience before adoption?
The sheer scale of the trauma the boy had experienced only came to light when the family began working with therapists from Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS).
In one email – seen by The Courier – a psychiatrist refers to their adopted son being left in the same house as a dead baby “for days”, while staying with a foster family.
They write: “A baby who was terminally ill was fostered by this family when he was 23 months old and died 3 months later.
“This has had a profound effect on [name redacted], who still talks about the baby’s body being kept in the house for several days.”
Sharon says: “This has caused him substantial trauma, and to this day he still has nightmares about the dead baby.”
Before this placement, the boy stayed with another foster couple, who were later struck off the register. Sharon and James have concerns that this could mean their adopted son did not receive suitable care during his time with them.
In addition, the couple claim they only discovered that the boy’s birth father suffered from schizophrenia after being given a letter by a previous foster parent.
They say Fife Council social workers did not disclose this to them. Schizophrenia “tends to run in families”, according to the NHS.
The boy has already been diagnosed with autism, ADHD, complex trauma and borderline personality disorder.
The couple also believe the boy’s birth mother may have taken illicit drugs while she was pregnant with him.
The extent of the situation came to light when a doctor got in touch to say that the toddler required an HIV test due to his mother’s reported drug use.
Thankfully, the results of the HIV test came back negative.
Did social workers mislead the family?
Their adopted son requested access to his social work files in 2024.
The papers contained more painful discoveries for the family, revealing that they were being used as respite carers in a trial period.
A respite carer is someone who temporarily cares for a person so that the primary caregiver can have a break.
Sharon and James say they were approved as adopters and never agreed to be foster or respite carers, and that this was hidden from them. The boy was not released for adoption prior to moving over to them and they eventually adopted him in 2014.
They say they would never have agreed to be respite carers, if they had known that was the case.
They claim Fife social workers gave no indication of their adopted son’s complex history or the extent of his behavioural issues.
The social workers told them he was a “gorgeous boy with blonde hair and blue eyes” and “a bit of a handful”, the couple told us.
This, Sharon remarks now, “was the understatement of the century”.
What have the boy’s complex needs meant for the family?
The demanding nature of his needs has had a “huge impact” on their lives and that of their children.
The couple say he struggled to cope in primary and secondary school, which he attended part-time.
Sharon explains: “James and I were having to leave work because he couldn’t face school, or we were getting phone calls to go and pick him up early because he was throwing chairs, or he was just being totally disruptive at school.”
His support needs have made it impossible for them to continue working full-time.
Sharon has left her job in marketing at a global oil and gas engineering company. She now works part-time in recruitment.
James, a self-employed gas engineer, doesn’t even have the capacity to work part-time.
While this was made financially possible by an adoption allowance they received up until 2024, this has been withdrawn now that their son is an adult.
The impact on their other children and family life has been significant, with the couple’s biological children moving out after being unable to cope with the disruption.
They say their adopted son is in so much emotional pain that he has resorted to self-harm at times.
What support has the boy received?
The now young man has received extensive therapy for his mental health needs since he came into the couple’s care.
He attended CAMHS sessions as a child, funded by the NHS, but the service wasn’t able to meet his “complex needs”
The couple then enlisted the help of a private therapist in Perth.
They say Fife Council helped to cover the cost of some of these sessions, but stopped paying when he turned 18.
The couple are now covering this cost themselves.
They believe the bill should be paid for by the local authority because their adopted son is suffering from “damage that was done under Fife Council’s care”.
How has Fife Council responded?
James Ross is the local authority’s head of children and families.
“Adopting a child is a huge decision and there are rigorous processes involved to help support anyone making this potentially life-changing commitment.
“The council has provided significant financial support in this case, and discussions have taken place with the family to ensure a smooth transition to appropriate adult services.”
Sharon and James do not feel hopeful for the future. They say their son has been unable to sustain a college education or a job.
He is also unable to live alone. The family tried to support him to live independently in a Perth flat, but he was unable to do so.
The couple stress they love their son.
Sharon says: “I’m making this sound horrific, which it is – but he’s our boy, and we adore this boy.
“You know, he’s funny when he can be, he’s loving, and he’s exactly where he is meant to be.
“But it’s not the life we would have chosen.”
Their adopted son told The Courier: “Not only was what happened horrific, but it was totally avoidable.
“Both what happened to me in care and that information that was withheld from my adopted parents.
“Fife Council Social Work’s failure wasn’t just disappointing, it was a betrayal of the care they were supposed to provide.”
Conversation