Maurice Malpas knows the rousing return of the Dundee derby may have a devastating effect on his golf handicap.
But that has done nothing to dampen the Tannadice icon’s enthusiasm for the prospect.
Dundee United will face their city foes for the first time since April 2022 following their Championship title win, with Malpas ready to again lap up a rivalry with plenty of competitive edge but scarce malice.
Indeed, Malpas, who played more games than any other man in Tangerine other than the iconic Dave Narey, isn’t safe from the “banter” when the sides cross swords – even when lining up a tee shot.
And he knows it will be unbearable if the Dee collect the bragging rights.
“I like the banter around the town and in the pubs, and I do enjoy the games,” Malpas told Courier Sport. “They aren’t always particularly good to watch, in a football sense, but I love the rivalry.
“It’s never vicious but there’s massive competition to win.
“I enjoyed playing in that game and I’m the same watching it.
“But it’s important that you come out on the winning side because you don’t want to get the stick everywhere you go!
“I get guys walking across three or four fairways on the golf course to give me pelters – Dundee fans pretending they’ve hooked their shot so they can come across.
“I’m standing there going, “get a grip, you can save this for the clubhouse after!” It’ll ruin my handicap.”
No holiday for Jim Goodwin
Mouth-watering showdowns with Dundee are far from the only test awaiting the Terrors in the top tier.
United staff and players alike have made it clear that they want to push towards the top-six in their first season back in the big time and, having seen 15 players depart last month, there is plenty of building to be done.
The Tangerines fought off stiff competition from Blackpool to sign Will Ferry following his release by Cheltenham Town, while Dave Richards has arrived to bring depth and experience to the goalkeeping pool.
Macedonian wide-man Kristijan Trapanovski is expected to join from FK Shkupi on a two-year deal with a club-led option for a further season, subject to a visa being granted and medical.
“It’s a massive close season for the club because they need to get a squad intact that can handle the Premiership, then get wired into it,” urged Malpas.
“Jim (Goodwin) might be enjoying a holiday, but I can guarantee any holidays will be getting interrupted with calls about umpteen players!
“It all about building a team that can win games. There are no pretty pictures on a league table – it’s all about the points. Hopefully, United can get off to a flyer and get a bit of confidence because this is the toughest league to play in.”
Fortress Tannadice?
Malpas has also underlined the need to make Tannadice a fortress, having picked up five more points on the road last season than they managed on home soil – albeit United’s 12 away wins in the league was the best in the club’s history.
“It will be imperative that they do well at home if they want to achieve anything,” added the 1994 Scottish Cup-winning captain. “The fans can sometimes get a bit twitchy and critical – but that’s football.
“I’d rather play in front of 12,000 fans who are giving you a hard time if you are struggling than play in front of 3,000 fans who maybe don’t have the same demands and expectations.
“And the supporters were unbelievable last season.”
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